Cyborg: I can interface with satellites that allow me to perceive and measure countless electric signals and waves flying through space and the atmosphere.I can listen to the sun, live. But sure, let’s all freak out because Beast Boy just figured out he can see shrimp colors.
Beast Boy: Cranky ‘cuz you can’t see shrimp colors, aren’t ya?
Raven, not even looking up from her book: Tch. I can see shrimp colors too, it’s just there’s no way for me to see them without also perceiving 13 overlapping hell dimensions at the same time.
Beast Boy: Wh… what?
Cyborg: Seconded. What?
Raven: Oh it’s all ‘Raven why don’t you talk about yourself more’ until I mention the ‘Everyone’s face is peeled off’ dimension.
chekov’s cat: if you see a cat, it will probably be relevant later.
schroedinger’s gun: there’s no way to know if a gun is loaded or not until you physically inspect and check it yourself, so it’s safest to assume all guns are loaded.
thinking about today. Batman having to take an injured teammate who doesn’t know his secret identity to the Batcave and they just assume it is his House. like oh yeah Batman lives in a big, spooky underground cave, full of literal bats? yeah that checks out.
looking at the cot where Bruce crashes when he’s working through the night like ‘ah that must be where he sleeps… that is his sad little bedroom :(’
‘aw there’s no clothes in this closet except more batsuits. guess that must be all he ever wears. :(’
You mean the Batcot and the Bat-minifridge
Everything is covered in Bat Symbols. Everyone who visits assumes he can’t afford a better Bat Bed or Bat House because he spends all his Bat Money on Bat Symbols
yeah they think it’s a dril candles tweet situation. he’s terrible at budgeting just spends all his money on custom made bat-branded equipment.
They look in the mini-fridge and it’s just two (2) plain unseasoned chicken breasts, half a thing of Sunny D (via one of the robins), an unopened bottle of ketchup, and a mostly-eaten bag of shredded cheese.
‘they’re like huh does Batman just sit at his batcomputer eating handfuls of shredded cheese out the bag’, and they’re right, he does.
Okay but imagine coming to a bachelor’s shitty one bedroom apartment all he’s got is a mini fridge and a mattress on the floor and then a butler wearing a tuxedo walks in with a tray of artisanal chicken nuggets like “your meal, sir”
batman and his boyfriend bruce wayne have some weird joint custody deal over the butler that’s literally twice their age and everyone is so curious and no one is brave enough to ask
they assume that bruce wayne is funding batman and keeping him alive but batman keeps spending all of bruces money on bat symbols
This is why aliens don’t want us in their Starfleet.
Are you fucking kidding this is why aliens should be begging us to join their Starfleet. The precision?? The CONTROL?? The absolute mastery this driver has over their 20+ ton of steel is superhuman. This person could weave a mothership through an asteroid belt without making a single scratch on the hull. Foh “aliens don’t want us” aliens should be sucking our dicks.
Just today, I saw a truck driver with exactly the opposite abilities. He took over 15 minutes to back his city box 10-wheeler into a loading dock with a foot of clearance on either side of his rig. More than once he was spot-on aligned and then decided to over-correct instead of just backing on in.
Whoever taught him to drive should be ashamed and whoever passed his certification should be fired.
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
