Silver Tongue

writing-prompt-s:

A family gathers to mourn the death of one of their own, a poor soul who died at a young age. Just as the funeral begins, the doors burst open. You are standing in the doorway holding a briefcase. “I object!” you say to the crowd.

okay but i would watch a show about a lawyer whose clients are souls of the damned and trying to get them out of the contract

rosexknight:

roman-lxix:

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Anybody else get this??

(Template made by @banozac )

Bonus:

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

drowtales:

With Bowsette done, now to feed the Chompette meme! 

weirdmageddon:

that YO THATS MICHAEL JACKSON !! HEE HEE hee hEE ᴴᴱᴱ ᴴᴱᴱ OHMʸᴳᴼᴼᴼᴰᴰ video is one of the funniest things ive seen

the way this guy just. stops..lmfao

chefpyro:

FYI if you’re on mobile and my icon didnt update, clear the cache data

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Never

krwzprtt:

enochian-dick-jokes:

broke-broken-breaking:

prokopetz:

If you’re trying to catch a housecat that’s gotten outside, don’t forget: they’re an ambush predator and you’re a persistence predator. You have several times more endurance than they do - use that to your advantage! Don’t run after them; that’s playing to the cat’s strengths, and vigorous pursuit may cause them to hide. Instead, follow them at a brisk walking pace until they get tired and need to have a lie-down, at which point you can simply pick them up and take them home.

Ok but no shit this tactic is what allowed humans to survive pre-civilisation

Some mammoth: *chilling, eating grass, mammothing*

Cavedude: *power walks towards them*

Mammoth: oh sIHT

cat : haha you can’t outrun me

human:

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