Silver Tongue

your-friendly-neighbohood-black:

a-dull-glow:

apostatively:

systlin:

voidspacer:

My roomba is scared of thunderstorms

I was sitting at my desk just a few minutes ago, drawing, and a really loud crack of thunder went off–no power surges or anything, just thunder–and my roomba fled from its dock and started spinning in circles

I currently now have an active roomba sitting quietly on my lap

Humans will pack bond with anything. 

I had a teenage girl come into my tea shop with her mother the other night. She purposely grabbed a teamaker in the most crunched-up looking box on the shelf (got banged around in shipment) and carried it protectively over to the counter. “If something’s in a damaged box I have to get it because I’m afraid no one else will love it,” she laughed nervously.

Not only will humans pack bond with anything, the empathy level of adolescent girls in particular likely has puppy-saving, world hunger-solving, war-ending powers.

I once saw a really bumpy lime at the grocery store, just a real ugly fruit. Later that night my boyfriend & I were driving home from rehearsal at like 11:30pm & passed the grocery store & I stared crying & he said “is it that lime? Do you want to go back and get it?” And I nodded and pulled the car around and bought the lime.

I saw this post once but IT GOT EVEN BETTER

val-ritz:

spreezpz:

spreezpz:

Therapists are just…. Common sense filters

Me: yeah so I just don’t have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don’t

Her: why don’t you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together

Me:

Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don’t have to make a sandwich.

Me:

Me: what

given the choice between socially unacceptable behavior and death, choose a fistful of ham. every time.

What A Great Idea!

cooltoy101:

pr1nceshawn:

This billboard is made of 2,000 cheeseburgers that anyone can take for free.

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This bag of chips has two perforations so you can open it more the further down you eat.

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This pill bottle lid tells you when you last opened it.

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This is a phone charging station where you can pedal to get power.

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Trash bins in Copenhagen are angled so cyclists can toss their trash while biking.

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This dressing room has labeled hooks to help you separate your clothes.

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Choose a cup and let everyone know about your current status.

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Doghouses near a supermarket in Copenhagen.

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There’s a special place for your pet in this supermarket cart.

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A cafe in Poland provides its guests with water for their pets. 

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 These bananas are sorted by how ripe they are at the moment.

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This pharmacy has a magnifying glass so people can read medicine labels more easily.

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This pizza place has a display with all their pizza sizes and how large they are compared to each other.

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Big Dave

randomslasher:

fightingforwriting:

How I think I’m writing: Using eye contact, or lack thereof, to display emotions such as intimacy, shock, denial, or nervousness. 

How I’m actually writing: She looked at me, and I looked away. I tried to look back, but she was already looking at the sky. “Look,” she sighs, looking back at me for a split second. “I don’t know how to say this.” We looked at each other and time stopped, but then she looked her lookers at something else to look at, looking tired. 

this was delightful and relatable

leaddoodles:
“Busy Office WivesPATREON TIP JAR LINK
Buy me a Ko-Fi?
”

cuttlfish:

sheikofthesheikah:

my sister is doing an essay for her finance course about bitcoin and her introduction is basically defining currency and equal payments.

so i told her to add alchemy’s first law of equivalent exchange. she just sent me the essay to look over it and

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she fucking did.

ELRIC, A

gallusrostromegalus:

wheresquidsdare:

katy-l-wood:

wheresquidsdare:

gallusrostromegalus:

katy-l-wood:

I think growing up on a steady diet of fanfiction made me hate traditional book genres. Like, I don’t care what the overall “theme” is. Gimme the tags. Is there character death? Sibling rivalry? Snarky best friend? That’ll do way more to get me into a book than slotting it into one of a dozen strictly defined boxes that tells me almost nothing.

Last time I was in a bookstore I was rifling through the paperbacks going “where the hell is the Content rating? is this ‘mature’ or are we in for actual funtimes here?  And where are the Content Warnings?  whatcha got here book?  You gonna get weird on me?” 
So really, Ao3 has me spoiled.

This gave me a brilliant idea for book displays at the library. #angst #enemies to lovers #plot twist

You are a good librarian!

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I only have flat shelves to work with but…. I did it.

ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL.  YOU ARE A GOD AMONGST MORTALS.

malicioustimetraveler:

malicioustimetraveler:

true-king-of-monsters:

bathyspheric:

samuel-makara:

bathyspheric:

bathyspheric:

Big Daddy: *walks around making whale noises*

Rapture Citizens, for some reason:

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Everyone acting shocked is a FAKE BioShock fan because they forgot the canon Big Daddy-themed erotica:

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I try to forget this

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you can’t

Y’ALL

I can make it worse but not now

actually fuck it 

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chefpyro:

rave-lord-nito:

chefpyro:

topographicocean:

chefpyro:

It’s 2018 and I still have no clue how CDs work. It’s a shiny disc, how do they get data on that, let alone that much?? Magic

Like a vinyl disc, where a physical groove is marked into the vinyl, a laser marks the ink of a CD in a similar manner.

A laser (your disc drive) can then look at the pattern in the ink and understand it.

There’s no grooves on a CD tho???

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They’re just really tiny, hence the laser. The smaller grooves means that more info can fit on a disc of the same size.

Man how the fuck did they figure out how to make that

They took the vinyl concept and made it smaller. Like how they took the concept of computers and made them small enough to fit in your hand

Imagine Rose but they’re raised by Dad Egbert.
Anonymous

banishedquasiroyal-deact:

you probably weren’t asking for “self indulgent step siblings au” but uhhh

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HOLIDAY CARD WITH THESE KIDS