Silver Tongue

imaginescalemates:

yejimeatbun:

imaginescalemates:

adding unnecessary comments to posts more like

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…. oh. I’m sorry. I’ll just sit in that corner over there… *sulks and grows mushrooms on my back*

what the fuck

whynotfabulous:

daeynore:

whynotfabulous:

thegoodsandy:

whynotfabulous:

babyblueavenger:

whynotfabulous:

mayflydecember:

whynotfabulous:

captain-oh-no-not-again:

whynotfabulous:

treslecheslife:

whynotfabulous:

trashboi413:

whynotfabulous:

marten-blackwood:

whynotfabulous:

gnomer-denois:

whynotfabulous:

whynotfabulous:

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

Because it’s also evil

Thanks!

Have scientists figured out what dark matter is yet?

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

Wow!

What happens if you eat 23 packages of peeps?

You meet god

Thank goodness!

What’s the correct way to eat a banana?

Whole, in one gulp.

Delicious!

Who is the Muffin Man?

Father of the Muffin Boy

Makes sense!

Why is my car making a ker-klunk noise?

Car’s haunted

Uh Oh

How to fix a haunted car?

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

It worked!

Where does the wax in scented candles go?

into the sky, where it turns into stars

Cool!

Why are weddings so damn expensive?

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

….Ah

monsterfactoryfanfic:

stairset:

stairset:

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OP you’re my personal fucking hero

voidfishplural:

The Adventure Zone Is A Comedy Podcast

dont forget this

When someone leaves your life, those exits… are… not made equal. Some are beautiful, and poetic, and satisfying. Others are… abrupt and unfair, but most are just unremarkable, unintentional, clumsy.

voidfishplural:

The Adventure Zone Is A Comedy Podcast

the-marxist-mash:

fresnel149:

enriquemzn262:

takineko:

gamegrrl:

can’t wait until people start claiming to be shadowbanned on this site and we collectively get to inform them that there’s no algorithm and their posts just suck

There absolutely is shadow banning.

It really is real, I had to write to the staff to get un-shadow banned.

If they undid it, that was spaghetti code, not a shadow ban. See: this post

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See this complete incompetence is why I’m on this site

t4tfaggot:

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have some teenz

btwxsixesandsevens:
“the Noir possibilities in this being your opening line are unmatched.
”

btwxsixesandsevens:

the Noir possibilities in this being your opening line are unmatched.

rose—child:

harleyquinnstation:

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Harley & Bruce in Dark Knights of Steel #1 and #2

Oh my god she’s a court jester