papatulus:

cheercaptain:

PSA: any sentence that follows the formula of “verb your noun” e.g “pee your pants” “kiss your wife” “water your plants” is code for “kill yourself” and if you receive such a message here on tumblr.com you should report it to the cyber authorities immediately 

my mum: eat your vegetables!!

me, a 27 year old tumblr user: just say you hate mentally ill people

haiku-oezu:

As far as I can remember it’s always been with me, even before I realized it was sexual

Then when I got on the internet and I started getting the urge of looking for… you know, I found out the nature of the attraction and I was like “oh yeah, that makes sense”

timlovejoy:

chichi-milk:

Please i love when anime characters (especially boys) have like cat mouths (like this :3)

nubs-mgee:

Couples who pun together, stay together

You have gills

franksgun:

opeo:

its all fun and games until you accidentally say “scrappy doo is a dilf” in front of your entire math class

suturmon:

me: about to walk into hyrule castle to fight ganon

honey: literally comes outta nowhere, flops down on top of me and falls asleep purring

me: we’re in this together