One of my favorite things to see is random people trying to interact with unfamiliar outdoor cats. Just standing there with a hand out, making kissy noises, maybe meowing at the cat while it ignores them. Mankind at its best and least dignified
if you want to interact with a cat that doesn’t know you, sit down not facing it. glance at it occasionally and make an inviting noise, but mostly just play with your phone or whatever.
the cat will almost certainly come over to check you out sooner or later. it’ll stay out of arm’s reach because it doesn’t know if you’re a jerk. offer your hand and let the cat sniff. wait. if the cat wants pettins, it will indicate that by noofing your hand, flopping on its side, or coming in close.
the cat may want to be bros but not get pettins. in that case, it will sit or lie near you but out of reach. this is friendly! the cat is saying, you’re a person in my neighborhood! hi neighbor!
of course, it’s possible that the cat is a great big cuddleslut and will come love all over you. that happens too. but if it doesn’t, that doesn’t mean it’s an unfriendly cat. be chill and let the cat choose how close to get, and you’ll find most cats are pretty friendly.
Our fighter was killed in our last session (yeah the one that tried to throw my gnome bard through a window) so we trekked off to find our cleric to bring him back. Since it was only our NPC wizard, our Druid and I around for this session, we basically tied his corpse up and dragged it behind us but placed bagpipes in his mouth so when he hit a bump we’d at least get some entertainment. We successfully revived him after a good roll from me to save his life and a contribution from everyone in our party to help resurrect him.
DM: Your party member comes back to life with a gasp, confused, disoriented and weak.
Me: Good. I slap him across the face as hard as I can and shout “Welcome back asshole!”
Fighter: *Lays back down* Let me die again please.
Can I just say this is Game Grumps in a nutshell
(From YOUTUBERS REACT TO TOP 10 FACEBOOK PAGES OF ALL TIME)
IKEA bringing the SÅLT
that guys comment says so much about the american nationalism and attitudes towards other countries
I talked to the McElroys for 15 goddamn minutes and Griffin told my parrot to go fuck itself
Buckle up kiddos, this is a story for the ages
Last night, I went to the Chicago live show, and in short it was one of the best nights of my life. I laughed so hard I choked on my Fancy Theater Sprite™. Cosplayers frolicked amongst people in Shrimp Heaven T Shirts amongst people in their Sunday best.
Towards the end of the show, the boys traditionally asked for questions from the crowd, and immediately over 1000 hands shot up. I was up in the balcony, but I raised my hand anyways for kicks. No waving, no movement. My hand was a beacon, a goddamn lighthouse in the middle of a swarming sea of desperate fans. Travis and I locked eyes. I felt my stomach drop.
“The person in the…purple hoodie?”
“You mean this?” I said as I stood and my crimson cosplay robe fell around my shoulders.
“Yeah!! Come on down!”
In a blur I made my way to the aisle as quickly as possible, people clapping me on the back and whispering “don’t mess up” all the while. My hands were shaking so bad that I couldn’t hold on to the railing as I climbed down three flights of stairs and walked down the aisle to the microphone.
And immediately caused someone to face plant into said microphone out of our combined clumsiness and panic (she was ok but boy shitting howdy do I feel bad). I waited for my turn slowly being consumed by blind terror. Everything I said was going to be forever embedded into podcast history for all of eternity. I Could Not Mess Up.
As they called me forward I mustered up every drop of comedic timing within me, every tactic of improv I could remember. I stepped up to the microphone. “So a little over a year ago, we bought a parrot, and it was, like, a cool pet…”
“yeah, AS OPPOSED TO THOSE SHITTY DOGS, RIGHT?” Griffin interjected. The crowd roared for what felt like years, until it was finally quiet enough for me to continue. Dead silence.
“Boys, now I have 7 parrots. Please help.”
In all my years, I will never forget the look on Griffin Andrew McElroy’s face as the realization hit him. It was like he was hit by a motherfucking monster truck, and the monster truck was being driven by my seven birds of the apocalypse.
For the next 15 minutes I talked to three of the coolest people alive as all four of us ragged on my 7 horrible, horrible birds. Highlights include:
“WHAT MADE YOU THINK, AFTER SIX GODDAMN BIRDS, THAT YOU NEEDED A SEVENTH?”
“YOU HAVE A FUCKING BIRD NAMED PIKACHU?”
“BIRD NUMBER 4 WAS LONELY?”
“FUCK SADIE”
It was the best night of my entire life and I physically cannot wait until the episode comes out.
I’m really glad i looked this up because i choked on my drink (link) Parrot shouting starts at 59 minutes in.
We were at this show and had an existential crisis hearing this play out
(the DM was trying to call it “El Doraydo” and it devolved from there.)
Our human bard/ranger tries to explain why we forced our way through the repulsion/invisibility spell barrier to 15 guards.
Head Guard: No one is supposed to find this place. You’re not supposed to be here.
Dragonborn Warlock: Well, tough titties!
