banishedquasiroyal:

pixxle-chan:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

banishedquasiroyal-deactivated2:

in some cases, yes! my domestic honk fiend (norwegian black harlequin variant) enthusiastically tried to coil around most inanimate objects upon entering his heat. it was a bit frightening because it was my first time experiencing a domestic clown struggle with the throes of wanting to procreate, but i simply put out a craigslist ad and before i knew it, my lil Roosevelt was engaged in the beautiful and terrifying act of mating with a purebred violet streaked mime (she’s due to lay any day now. i can’t believe i’m going to be a grandma)

i feel incredibly sullied

holy crap it’s tagged Clown Husbandry 

alternatively, clowns are hermaphrodites and mate hanging upside down like slugs

im sorry what the fuck is going on

I just realized the person who fricken posted that is a homestuck fan. That explains everything. Lmao.

are you implying that there are people on this website who haven’t read homestuck

affurro:

I hope this hasn’t been done yet.

hanatsuki89:

“Are sharks jealous?”, or the story of how I saw a huge shark plushie in a store and instead of buying it I went home and drew this

(sorry for any glaring mistakes in their designs, but I still haven’t played the game - obviously)

temporalgearshift:

chaoticjustise:

temporalgearshift:

blue-r4ven:

temporalgearshift:

yes i do know all the zodiac signs… aries the ram, tavros the bull, gemini the double headed cyclops, cancer the crab, leo the lion fursona, virgo the vampire, libra the scales, serket the spider, saggitarius the buff centaur, aquarius the flying seahorse and pisces the lowkey bitch

you forgot capricorn the juggalo

i know what i’m about son

*Scorpio the spider. Your homestuck was showing too much.

wow you got me thats the only homestuck reference in this entire shitpost congrats

officialfist:

dear-tumb1r:

officialfist:

dear-tumb1r:

dear-tumb1r:

dear-tumb1r:

dangerbooze:

dear-tumb1r:

dear-tumb1r:

My german friend doesn’t believe in Roombas

He thinks we’re making it up and hes very angry about it

Hes accusing us of making fake amazon pages

He thinks they’re bullshit and says if we really had them why would we need maids

How do i tell him we mostly dont have maids

“Bro, we don’t have maids.”

So i said “only rich people really have maids”

And he said “why?”

“Maids are expensive”

“Just pay a kid 10€ an hour to clean”

Thats EXPENSIVE and also illegal, buddy

Child labor laws are a thing

He still thinks roombas are a lie

So it turns out in germany they use vacuum cleaners for like, the drapes and shit

So he didnt understand that roombas only clean the floor

He was angry because he thought we were claiming we had wall crawling robots

Now hes mad about dusters because vacuums are more efficient so why would we use feathers on a stick

Oh man don’t tell him about Swiffer brand

I did and he is literally crying with rage

Like i can hear his voice quivering

Holy shit my guy you are actually ruining this mans will to live.

mituna:

“queerplatonic” just say moirails you fucking cowards

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:

lonelylargsmollesbo:

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:

I found my old Gryffindor robe so I’m just gonna default Hermione for Halloween this year, but I also don’t have anything that could remotely resemble the uniform to wear under it, so like…what should I do about that?

Wear heart boxers and a “I eat ass” shirt underneath and keep the robe closed

Hermione always dressed like that, it was just never important to Harry’s story

werewolfbandaids:

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY