my favorite thing i’ve learned in college is that way back in ancient china there was this poet/philosopher guy who wrote this whole pretentious poem about how enlightened he was that was like “the eight winds cannot move me” blahblahblah and he was really proud of it so he sent it to his friend who lived across the lake and then his friend sends it back and just writes “FART” (or the ancient Chinese equivalent) on it and he was SO MAD he travels across the lake to chew his friend out and when he gets there his friend says “wow. the eight winds cannot move you, but one fart sends you across the lake”
i googled this bc i desperately wanted this to be real, and guess what…it is.
the dude’s name was su dongpo (also known as su shi). his original poem went like this:
稽首天中天，
毫光照大千，
八風吹不動，
端坐紫金蓮
(Humbly bowed my head below all skies Minutest lights shine through my deepest bounds Immovable by strong winds from eight sides Upon purplish gold lotus I seated straightly by the low mound) (x)
on which his friend wrote “放屁” (fart, literally), and you know the rest.
this is even funnier because just writing “fart” out of the blue sounds really stupid and random in english, but in chinese, fart (fang pi) is used as a common reply to, well, people talking out of their ass. kind of like how we’d use “bullshit” in context.
Justin:Griffin’s just sitting at the end… juggling–fushigi-ing two glass balls in super tight pants, just waiting for his kid delivery.
Griffin: [dismissively] Well, they’d–
Justin:Once he, bests his minions.
Griffin:–they would be Pokeballs, and also it’s not a kid delivery, this’n–there’s no fuckin’ guarentee that a kid that comes [intense] INTO THE BEGINNING of my crucible… makes it to the END of it undefeated. [beat, stammering] In fact, I–I’d say–I’m gonna pack–I’m gonna stack this gym! With fuckin’ PROS. I-It’s gonna–It’s going to be… It’s–It’s gonna be brutal. It’s going to be a torture chamber.
Travis:What–well, what’s the theme? What’s the theme, are you like–is it a Bug theme, is it–
Griffin: [thickest, most annoyed sarcasm imaginable] YEAH TRAVIS, UH, UH, UH, UUUHYEAH TRAV! I’M GONNA OPEN UP A ~Bug-type~ Pokemon gym! You idiot! Yeah, that’s what I want, because I want to give out–I wanna–I wanna shit out badges for every… ham and egger that comes to my front door!
Justin: [laughing]
Griffin: Yeah, that’s right Travis! [doofus voice] “Go, Caterpie!” [normally] That’s me, you fucking imbecile. [bad Justin Roiland impression] “Yeuh go… do your best, Kakuna!” [normally, smile in voice] What are you fucking talki–?! Yeah, Bug-type gym.
Justin: …maybe Fire? Fire-type, could you do Fire-type?
Travis:Fire-based? Make it a–
Griffin: Yeah, yeah, I’ll probably just… that’s a good idea Justin, I’ll probably just do a Fire-type one, so that [angry screaming] ONE KID WITH ONE BLASTOISE CAN FUCK UP MY WHOLE SHOP.
Justin: [laughing quietly]
Griffin:Killed all of us with one Blastoise, huh? Wow, shit, I shoulda…
Justin: Yeah, I don’t–
Travis: Just do Rock, then! Just do Rock-type!
Griffin: [voice dripping with malice] …the same Blastoise,
Just gonna say: There is literally no romance in Thor: Ragnarok. No romance subplots, no kissing. The closest thing to it is when Hulk sees part of a video of Black Widow and it turns him back into Bruce Banner. Besides that? Nothing. It was awesome.
False there is a clearly defined 3 seconds where its implied that Loki went down on Jeff Goldblum.
This is the only argument to this post that I will accept
Achievements of people born into excessive wealth mean nothing I’m sorry
it’s so interesting so many people keep repeating this same line of “it’s not like they could control where they were born”. and yet. absurdly rich folks do not take that into consideration when poor people need something they don’t immediately have. it’s always “well work for it! work for your food/water/shelter/health” there’s never any consideration to what life that poor person was born into even though they never had any control over it either. interesting how wealthy people feel comfortable playing that card.
It isn’t a home run if you were born on third base…
My girl spoke nothing but fucking TRUTH. Now that’s this kind of Women we need our girls to look up too.
Who is she?
Sarah Kendzior.
She’s an expert in authoritarianism and has accurately predicted almost everything that is happening - her unflinching insight and analysis is terrifying but invaluable right now. Well worth following on twitter.
fucking
why did i never see this until now
You know what saddens me?
How fast she has to talk.
If a man were saying that, he’d be going slowly to emphasise points. He’d be indulging in the occasional ‘you know’ or other filler words. He’d be able to stop for breath. Notice that she didn’t do that. She had the whole thing memorised and she got it out with barely a pause to breathe.
Why?
Because she expected to be interrupted.
What she said was awesome and is absolutely true, and is frankly underlined by the fact that she had to say the whole thing all at once for fear that she wouldn’t be able to say it at all if she so much as stopped to breathe because one of those older white men sitting around her would interrupt and roll right over her.
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
