Hey @rosierugosa I hope it’s okay that I stole your tags because YES.
Because sexual desire is so weird and alien to me, personally, I find myself more accepting of weird and alien sex: I’m definitely not a monsterfucker in that I don’t wanna fuck the monster, but I fully accept and respect all monsterfucking because hey, sex in general – straight, gay, or otherwise! – is already so weird to me. Wanting to fuck Chad McDude down the street is just as strange to me as wanting to fuck the mothman. So my attitude is…go for it, I guess! Here’s a water bottle.
Same here, I’m not afraid to admit I’ve written a couple of filthy what if fanfics about the evil demon bad guy who totally is a giant dragon looking thing and the OC ninja chick totally getting it on that one time. That’s kind of hot. Wouldn’t it be weird if they fricked? Three times? Because he wants her soul for some blood ritual and enemies to lovers?
But yeah agreed. Sex is weird, I’m weird about it, whatever.
Just go for it!
How to spot the asexual: It’s all fun and games until you try to make them read self insert smut.
I will read the kinkiest filth, but try to mentally put me there and I’ll click away superfast.
Dr Doolittle-style show about a detective who can talk to animals, except instead of talking like people the animals still talk like animals, just translated into English sentences, so the plot of most episodes centres around trying to figure out what the star witness testimony actually means.
Victim’s murder was witnessed by her pet snake, whose tank was in the room. Unfortunately pet snake is incapable of describing the world around them except in terms of ‘rocks’ and 'meat’, with their descriptions of individual forms of 'meat’ focusing almost entirely on body temperature and smell.
(Solved when it turns out that their description of 'warm-cold meat with rock’ was actually an attempt to describe a suspect with a prosthetic limb, which is pretty unnoticeable to a human, but looks dramatically different in infrared.)
Murder at a honey farm. Each witness managed to see about ~0.06% of the full crime, in order to get the full picture, you have to get them to swarm.
Victim was found several days after death, already crawling with maggots. Days into the investigation, protag begins a frantic search to find any surviving maggots/flies that were on the corpse, after realising that how the victim tasted would give vital information about the poison used.
Also there’s at least one or two animals who actually do talk in full sentences and in terms humans can understand, and the reason behind this is never fully explained.
All cats in this universe talk in terms of 'mine/not-mine’ and mainly focus on territory, mates and food, with the one exception of the main character’s cat who is named Watson and knows how to use sarcasm.
All insects speak in one word sentences where everything is 'food’, 'enemy’ or (for hive insects) 'friend’ and 'queen’, with the exception of seven-spotted ladybirds specifically, who for some reason speak in full English sentences and are up to date and knowledgeable about world events. The protagonists is as concerned by the full implications of this as you are.
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
