The perfect plan.
@ihatejonarbuckle Jon has a vibrator in him
that’s absolutely fucking disgusting. i can’t even think of what jim davis intended it to be if not a vibrator
a bee
A huge and ancient dragon loses her clutch of eggs. She decides to adopt an office building full of employees as her children. But to keep them safe, she doesn’t want to let any of them leave.
“Mighty Opiess, Destroyer of Kingdoms, pl-”
“Mom.”
“Uhh…..right. Mom. Um, so I have to get back home. I’ve got three kids who need dinner and I really think I should..go….back………why are you crying?”
“Grandbabies!!”
wish i were alive in 2000 BCE so i could have devoted my life to the moon goddess and die at the old age of 28
“We are more than a bit concerned with the Benihana egg trick called for in the script. I’ve tried it and can only get it 1 out of 4 tries, and I’ve seen Benihana chefs flub the manoeuver when they have an entire grill as target. Mads has to crack his eggs into a 8-inch diameter skillet. The props Master calls his guy. The Production Manager calls in his guy. I call my guy. On the morning of the shoot we have 8 dozen eggs and 3 Japanese chefs with their hands made up to be hand doubles.
I guess I don’t have to tell you that when Mads arrives on set, he just tosses an egg up in the air and the egg breaks on the spatula. No problem. Unbelievable. I insist it was a lucky fluke but he does it again. I accuse him of practicing when I wasn’t looking but he laughs (as if he has time to practise egg-cracking between scenes) and tells me he was a juggler in his youth.” [x]
And here we all thought we’d have a million outtakes of Mads flubbing the egg trick…What the hell kind of test tube did this man walk out of?
I’m absolutely convinced mads is some super soldier commissioned by kojima
