me: im gonna go to bed early and get a good nights sleep
netflix: here’s a bunch of 45 minute documentaries on the wildlife inhabiting coastal islands
me: hhhdbhnnnnnnnnnnddndkkj coconut crab
back in freshman year of high school we had this teacher who was really fucking annoying and HATED cell phones with a fucking passion. at the beginning of the school year he had us sign this goddamned “contract” that we wouldn’t have it in class or he would confiscate it.
so this annoying douchebag kid was on his phone and the teacher went “you have to give it to me now you signed the contract” and the kid didn’t even look up and said “contracts signed by a minor are not legally binding” and continued to text. and i hated that kid but…..dare i say iconic
anyway he got detention for it but i just found out he got into law school this year
is this fucking real
why did he say his iq was 141 but then one line later says its 142
Rick and Morty is such an intelligent show that every time you reference it, your IQ increases by one.
whyarecareyandkilliansnickering:
someone pleeeaase talk to me about high school killian and carey just consider:
- everyone thinks that killian is a troublemaker because she’s this big buff hockey player but actually she’s the one going “dude we’re gonna get in trouble” as her scrappy gymnastic star gf drags her into schemes
- carey is a sprinter during the track season but won’t stop hanging around the jav and shotput gear
- pranks. do i even have to say. on each other, on no3113, on every single other person in the school. they spend so much time together that they have a permanent alibi for getting caught because they can just say they were with the other one and it’s not even a lie
- they’re that pair of best friends that was so grabby and handsy that when they got together no one noticed. sometimes killian walks around with carey on her shoulders, just because
- they’re also that couple that fuckin swing dances at prom
they’re right, it’s officially canon on this day because i said so
Three simple things we all know
1. Mass shootings are a daily occurrence. We only hear about the most “newsworthy” incidents. The Mass Shooting Tracker keeps a log, and it’s horrific to take in.
2. This level of gun violence is completely preventable. We absolutely already know that gun control saves lives, no matter what a politician has told you.
3. The government can’t seriously work on this problem because the National Rifle Association will not allow it.
But we should investigate Planned Parenthood some more.
I posted this on October 1st, 2015.
PSA: Brooklyn Nine-Nine is the rightful heir to the Parks & Rec and The Office legacies and should be regarded with the same love, admiration, and respect; if not more.
