me and the girls out on the town
I’m the girl on the right sitting down because my feet hurt and my shoes are uncomfortable
Bruce does the thing where when he wants to get his kids’ attention he’ll be like “Say your name if you can hear me!” because that’s what my mom does, so of course that’s totally something Bruce would do, especially because it makes things way easier when they’re talking through the comms on patrol. It’s gotten to the point where every time he does this, they just yell back random names
Bruce: “Say your name if you can hear me, guys.”
Dick: “SOFIA THE FIRST”
Barbara: “BARACK OBAMA”
Jason: “DIANA OF THEMYSCIRA”
Cass: “Jorge”
Tim: "MILEY CYRUS’ TRUSTY SLEDGEHAMMER”
Steph: “MARTIN LUTHOR KING JR, AT YOUR SERVICE”
Duke: “SMITTY WERBENJAGERMANJENSEN”
Damian: ”…Your mom”
Bruce: 😑
Yesterday I went to dinner to catch up with my buddy from the math department, and he told me this story about how he ran the city marathon in 2 hours, 59 minutes. That’s an amazing time. He was 19th out of thousands.
He was doing pretty well for the first half, but then his ankle started to hurt. He slowed down for a bit, but then this girl he passed before passed him, and he started overthinking whether or not it was awkward to pass the same person multiple times, and, like, what if they small-talked about it? He decided it was better to pass her and stay ahead, so he picked up the pace. A few miles later, he fell in with two dude-bros who started talking to him. Not pleased to find himself in the company of dude-bros, he pulled ahead once again. This continued for a while; every time he got closed to a group of other marathoners, his social anxiety kicked in and he ran faster because he felt nervous being near people.
TL;DR A mathematician ran an record marathon to avoid making small-talk with randos. He introverted his way into qualifying for the Boston marathon.
X2 (2003) dir. Bryan Singer
#logan is like in a competition with bruce wayne on how much family a man can collect around him #and still pretend to himself that he’s a ‘lone wolf’ #i’m better on my own! just me! and my 12 kids!
What if aliens visited Earth during the Jurassic Period, found it to be occupied with a bunch of mean, giant lizards and thought “Well, fuck this planet” and never came back?
what if when humans went out into the galaxy all the aliens panicked because if the dinosaurs’ tiny fur snacks now had spaceships and laser blasters and interstellar colonies then what the fuck were the dinosaurs up to???
#important human policy: do not let any aliens know the dinosaurs are extinct#EVER
jurassic park movies as extremely important interstellar propaganda
This is probably the best post on Tumblr tbh it combines aliens, dinosaurs, space travel, evolution, and borderline absurd humor in one thing
Humans then use cloning technology to recreate dinosaurs to impress aliens
