the signs as shitpost generator posts
aries: i always wind up making friends who accuse me of hating love
taurus: tfw you sink into the warm embrace of crime
gemini: i love to sin and smell like beyonce
cancer: im not a person. im a robot and i hate america
leo: dear diary... im embarrassed bc my crush heard about how i endorse heterosexuality
virgo: when i wake up i immediately disobey the president
libra: (sighing sadly) i guess i will bask in a torrential downpour of chaos
scorpio: i am not gentle or kind. i serenade my own ass
sagittarius: (shoveling handfuls of dirt into my mouth) i love light yagami
capricorn: cries bc i release memes
aquarius: (reclining in an antique armchair and sipping a thick black liquid from a wine glass) ah. i suppose it is time to hate anime
pisces: hey everyone! romanticize the void
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