adurot:

cutest-angel-in-heaven:

swede-bloggg:

pep95:

queenbradbury:

omg so yesterday i put a salt line on the pathway to our front door because i was fucking around and my brother was pretending to be a demon

and today we ordered pizza and the salt line was still there

and my brother went outside to sign for the pizza

and the pizzaman refused to step over the salt line, like he almost did and then he backed up and handed my bro the pizza and left; which is pretty ridiculous because it’s far from our door

so a heads up to everyone i’m pretty sure domino’s is actually run by demons??? kind of like how in men in black the post office is run by aliens

demono

((”Not just pizza”))

((”but eternal damnation”))

Geez man, why you gotta assume the worst in everyone and jump straight to demon? Maybe he was just an innocent giant slug in disguise trying to eek out an honest living.

Maybe he was sneople (snail people) and didn’t want to shrivel up. You should check your local snurch to see if he attends.