(aka reasons I love him)

Here’s your friendly reminder that this hotbot:

• Had a bed in his house, even though the lack of one in Napstablook’s house and their fake sleep in ruins indicate that ghosts most likely don’t need to sleep;
  
• Collected diaries, making only one entry in each;
  
• According to Toby, had 4, 5 and 6-fingered gloves because he wasn’t sure how many humans actually have;
  
• Got invited to an unfamiliar house and immideately decided that the appropriate thing to do is to lie seductively on her piano and feed himself grapes;
  
• Bonus points if he was in the box form; 
  
• Was unironically selling Bishie Cream, Anime Powder, Cute Juice, Attraction Slime, Beauty Yogurt and fashion basketballs made for wearing not playing;
  
• Also sweet treats made out of sparkling stars, burgers made out of edible glitter and sequins and sandwiches shaped like a sword; 
  
• Also pressed his face into the steaks and sold them as well (and it apparently wasn’t real meat either);
  
• Promised one of his employees that if something happens to him, their face will be pressed instead;
  
• Wrote reviews for his own hotel, one of which said “my face tastes beautiful!”;
  
• Had tables in form of himself in his restaurant;
• Refused to put functional lamps in the rooms of his hotel because “stars make their own light”;
  
• But put giant bottles of perfume called Eau de Rectangle that looked like lamps and had caps too large to open;
  
• Apparently placed a statue of himself in an already existing fountain, causing the water to flood the floor and the carpets?
  
• Hired a monster just because as a rectangle he sympathized with their angular struggles;
  
• Ignored all suggestions on the improvements of his hotel because “that’s not how they do it on the surface”;
  
• Instead of berating Burgerpants made a whole CD album full of songs of how bad he is at his job and played it;
  
• Was posing dramatically when the eggs on his cooking show didn’t turn out right and beating up villains on a quiz show;
• Had a show dedicated to washing hands;
  
• Made 28 movies all consisting of a 4-hour shot of rose petals showering his body;
• Made a fabulous entrance by sitting god knows for how long behind a wall of his friend’s lab and then repeatedly running into the said wall until he crashed through it;
  
• Included a question “would you smooch a ghost?” that only had answers “hell yeah” in his quiz and made the timer count up during that question;
  
• Had adorable rectangle outfits;
• Kept repeating “welly well well” when he couldn’t think of a good excuse;
  
• Tried to make a pun and immediately decided to cut it in post-production;
  
• Totally believed his enemy saying that there was a mirror behind his back and decided to check if he (a rectangle) looked good enough for the fight;
  
• Made Frisk write an essay about himself in like 6 seconds;
  
• Was fine with beating up a 10 yo and threating them with a chainsaw on live television, but didn’t allow them to write curse words in the essay because “family-friendly show”;
  
• Felt the need to have a union-regulated break in the middle of the fight;
  
• Caught a thrown stick in his mouth and winked;
  
• Pointed at his friend and her crush with a leg and said “smooch now”;
• Decided to sell Toriel plushies with his face instead of hers;
  
• Put legs on his rectangle.