langerdibs:

dangerhamster:

bundyspooks:

In the late 19th century, an inexperienced doctor performed his first surgery n a room full of people. Feeling the pressure, he felt the need to perform the amputation in the quickest time possible, and ended up amputating his patient’s arm in the space of around 25 seconds. In the process of this, he accidentally amputated his assistant’s fingers too. Both patient and assistant died of sepsis, and a spectator died from shock, making it the only operation ever with a 300% mortality rate.

how badly…can one person fuck up….

THIS IS MY BOY!! THIS IS MY BOY ROBERT LISTON!! LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT HIM!!

For starters, he practiced in a time before anesthesia was invented, when performing surgeries and amputations quickly were key to reducing a patients’ pain and upping their chance of survival. He was known as the ‘fastest knife on West End’ and could allegedly take a leg off in 2 ½ minutes. Some say he could amputate a limb in 30 seconds flat if he had to, he was exactly the man you wanted to call in case of emergency like this, because he could get you done and stitched nice and fast, before you bled out or died from shock.

On top of that, he was a theater surgeon, and I mean, he brought the THEATER to it. This man would scream for the students watching him to time him, and when he had to free his hands, shove his BLOODY FUCKING KNIFE between his teeth. Also, the 300% mortality rate wasn’t because he was inexperienced- it was because he was WAY TOO ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT CUTTING ARMS OFF, swinging his knife around for the effect. This was not the only time his enthusiasm got the better of him on the table, once, he amputated a man’s leg and accidentally took off his testicles in the same go.

He was, however, the first man to perform surgery with the use of anesthesia, and was a strong proponent of its use. He’s also famous for having UNSHAKABLE morals, he once got punched out a surgeon IN FRONT OF HIS WHOLE CLASS for displaying a woman’s corpse in a ‘voyeuristic’ manner, then straight-up took the body and had her decently buried (The woman was a murder victim and the surgeon he punched may have been complicit in the whole thing as well.).

Liston is such a coolio figure in early medical history he fight he heal he knock people the fuck out.