“I got a warranty on my headphones. They broke. I’d like this new pair.”
“Okay. Do you have the broken headphones?”
“No I was at the airport. I threw them away.”
“I’m sorry but we have to have the broken headphones.”
“Really?”
“Yes ma'am we exchange them for the new pair.”
“Seriously?”
Don’t give me your deadpan-ass voice you freaking moron you’re the idiot that threw it away. Did you think you just get a new pair because you can? No. that’s not how warranties work.
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