oleandir:

thoodleoo:

quousque:

thoodleoo:

i hate when people in movies/tv are reading ancient languages and they translate everything really smoothly and poetically, as if when people who study ancient languages aren’t consulting three different commentaries and sobbing profusely when we read

ok so like…. it says

“come you all into the deepest cavern, or maybe that’s fireplace, depends on usage, and having come may you give your…. treasures? Skin? Pants? I don’t know, something…. to the….. about-to-be-adored guy, that one who…. okay, he either causes earthquakes or sleeps a lot, I think this might be an idiom….”

“ok, sorry that took so long and i hate to disappoint but i’m still not entirely sure what it means, like, it could be something about a religious ceremony or it could be a dick joke. leaning towards dick joke, might be both. knowing the ancients, probably both. this could very well be an ancient dick temple and we should probably leave.”

man i want a whole series based around this idea with a team of people going into temples and ancient cities and shit, and trying to figure out what the fuck to do and where to go, and all the wild shenanigans that happen because they inevitably have to guess or miss important information or just plain get it wrong

the crucial difference in a culture that uses gemstones as currency between “you will be metaphorically showered with riches” and “you will be covered with rocks (from the ceiling from the trap full of boulders)” …

hell you could do it with that indiana jones reboot idea with lupita nyong'o as indiana and her putting artifacts back rather than taking them

also imagine if they had to negotiate with ancient godlike beings in these languages and they like “shit I’ve only seen these words written down pls slow down” and the godlike beings are pissed as fuck cos of stuff being stolen, and they’re trying to translate well enough to try and figure out what the hell was stolen so they can find it, and also maybe somehow talk their way out of smiting and rains of fire without accidentally calling the undead priests lazy fucks cause of bad pronounciation or unknowingly agreeing to making a sacrifice of freshly severed dicks for the dick temple