fuck-i-just

Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”

poselikeateam

Why does this not have any notes?

agentgreenfishy

lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”

thisismythanksgivingurl-gobble

“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”

operameister

“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”

thesteppinrazor

Pro tip: Don’t do this if you recently applied for a new job.

je-suis-un-espion

bolded. just in case.

londonhowell

i feel like that pro tip is told from experience