Silver Tongue
Why We No Longer Have Trumpets

yourplayersaidwhat:

DM: So you enter the palace, and there are trumpets sounding everywhere, the Prince is revealed-

Rogue: I steal a trumpet.

DM: *ignores and launches into his Prince speech*

Rogue: Can I steal a trumpet while the prince is talking

DM: No- Well, fine, roll for it.

*Rogue rolls a 3*

DM: Everyone notices. The guy you just tried to steal from offers to sell it to you for 150G.

Rogue: I roll intimidation to persuade him?

*rolls a 3*

By this point, everyone is dying of laughter.

NPC: It’d take more than that to get my trumpet! Listen, the Prince gives me a stable enough income, I need the money to give my wife a pres-

Rogue: Wait, if you get a stable income, why do you still have money issues. Why is it my responsibility to pay for your wife’s present.

NPC: Well- uh, m-my son, he-

Rogue: Your son spent all your money?! Dude you’re a terrible father and husband, just give me your trumpet you’re better off working somewhere else like a bank.

Monk: Roll psychological damage, on the NPC’s part.

DM: Just take the fucking trumpet it’s literally in a basket beside you it’s worth 5G can we please finish this the game just started 30min ago.

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