penicillium-pusher:

captocie:

penicillium-pusher:

I don’t trust Maroon 5

why

Well first of all there’s 7 band members, not 5. That’s not why I don’t trust them, I just think it’s weird.

Now getting to the point, do you know how many top 100 hits Maroon 5 has had? A lot. They’re even on billboards top 100 artists of all time (ALL TIME). And it’s understandable, because pretty much every song they put out is fucking awesome. Sugar, Don’t Wanna Know, Moves Like Jagger, Payphone, This Love, She Will Be Loved, Cold, Animals, Maps, Misery, Harder to Breathe, Never Gonna Leave This Bed… to name a FEW.

These shitheads have been popping out jams since I was a little kid. Well over a decade worth of killer music. Every other song I hear on the radio is Maroon 5. It’s always Maroon 5. And I fucking love it. I love all their songs. Everyone does, they’re awesome.

But here’s the thing. They’re never the top selling artists. On the top 100 list, they’re only in the 40s. They very rarely have a number 1 hit. They’re considered good, I suppose….. but not great. Not the best.

How many people have you heard say Maroon 5 is their favorite band? For me it’s zero. For many of you, it’s zero. If you’re thinking to yourself “what? No I love them, they’re my fave!” Are you sure? Are you really sure? They’re your absolute complete FAVORITE band ever??? I doubt it. You’re just saying that because the band is on your mind now. If I asked you your fave band any other time you’d come up with another answer. Everyone always does.

But they SHOULD be everyone favorites. Look at all of those songs. They’ve got so many top hits. Everyone loves their music. Everyone sings along and knows the songs. They should be my favorite band, I think I like more of their songs than of my actual favorite artist. But they are not my favorite. They are no ones favorite.

I think they made a deal with someone. Satan? God? A dude down an alleyway? Who knows. But I believe they made a deal to ensure everyone would love their music. And we do. It’s great music.

But the twist is that they’ll never truly be recognized as one of the best. Sure, their songs will play on the radio and everyone will sing along. They’ll have sold out concerts. Plenty of fans. But not enough. They’ll be just good. Never great. Never the best. Even if they should be our favorite, they never will be. They’ll never sell enough albums or have their songs reach as high on the billboards as they should. Everyone loves their music, per the agreement. But no one loves them.

I hope Adam Levine knows I’m on to him. I know what he did.

  1. someonepoisonedkyky reblogged this from thecaramelidiot
  2. definitely-not-an-alias reblogged this from thecaramelidiot
  3. thecaramelidiot reblogged this from fivewiththemoon
  4. iwanttorundirectlyintothesun reblogged this from space-finally
  5. fivewiththemoon reblogged this from runes-and-relics
  6. dolphinvulcan reblogged this from caffeinewitchcraft
  7. browneyedfairy reblogged this from suchkindness
  8. teddybearsneakers reblogged this from fuckassmcgee
  9. suchkindness reblogged this from roaringstream
  10. fuckassmcgee reblogged this from roaringstream
  11. taryo88 reblogged this from solemeismine
  12. awasteofattention reblogged this from roaringstream
  13. roaringstream reblogged this from letsboldlygomotherfuckers
  14. solemeismine reblogged this from the-impossible-oreo
  15. captainflinty reblogged this from the-impossible-oreo
  16. cheesy-dragons reblogged this from eriklehnsherrr
  17. the-impossible-oreo reblogged this from eriklehnsherrr
  18. flyer-than-wind reblogged this from eriklehnsherrr
  19. eriklehnsherrr reblogged this from pinkzzombie
  20. eisenvulcanstein reblogged this from caffeinewitchcraft
  21. prophetchuckstone reblogged this from avengingpotter
  22. avengingpotter reblogged this from silentandfriendly
  23. fandommayvary reblogged this from zwambysdimension
  24. zwambysdimension reblogged this from captainnargles
  25. thedescentbeckons reblogged this from guinevereslancelot
  26. peachalchemy reblogged this from theluckythreeleafclover
  27. ultimategaydisaster reblogged this from caffeinewitchcraft
  28. dragonlandsandyaoihands reblogged this from frumpkinspocketdimension
  29. nightvaleisjustaname reblogged this from pinkzzombie
  30. jessplease reblogged this from nothingmattersbut-you
  31. adventuresintheshadeoftea reblogged this from captainnargles
  32. nightlist reblogged this from suffering-lesbian
  33. penicillium-pusher posted this