apparently a large number of super mario fanboys are upset that ppl are shipping pauline with peach because it’s “mean to mario”, “excludes mario”, or “hurts mario’s feelings”. now i don’t want to be the bearer of bad news, but mario isn’t real. i know it’s hard to accept, but it’s true. also peach and pauline are canonically lesbians so they wouldn’t date him anyway!
“Also peach and pauline are canonically lesbians”
[Citation Needed]
of course, here you go!
mario is also a huge asshole. who cares about his feelings?
here’s the receipts.
when luigi won at tennis and mario comes in to make him feel like a bitch
mario hitting yoshi on the head:
Mario usurping a figure of power in a foreign land in the middle of a civil war
and dont forget that in delfino plaza, he defaced the whole island with a paint like substance, polluting their beautiful home and endangering their way of life. how can one not be aware of what is going on?