[The party has just killed several cultists that ambushed them.]

Rogue: “I’m gonna sit on this guy and search his body.”

[Rolls a nat 1 investigation.]

DM (me): “You begin searching the body, looking for anything of value. You find what feels like a pouch of gold in his pocket. As you begin squeezing it to see how much is in there, you realize… this is not a pouch of gold.”

Our very gay cleric: “It is to me!”