SOBS OPENLY WHILE TAKING A DREADFULLY PAINFUL SHIT WHILE COHEED AND CAMBRIA’S “WELCOME HOME” PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND. THERE ARE MULTIPLE SWOOPING SHOTS FROM VARIOUS ANGLES AS THE TEARS FALL DOWN MY FACE AND I CONTINUALLY REACH FOR THE TOILET PAPER. AND WHEN THE MID-SONG SOLO HITS? THAT’S WHEN THINGS GET