(context: my wizard and fighter are arguing whether to go explore the dungeon or stay in the town and talk to more people)
wizard: i slap him with my fish
me: excuse me
wizard: did i fucking stutter
me: fine, you [wizard] roll a d20 and you [fighter] roll dexterity saving to see if you can dodge
wizard: nat 20 get fUCKED
fighter: are you fucking kidding me. *turns to me* are you actually letting this happen
me: listen, he said he wanted to slap you with a fish, so i guess roll a d3 for fish
wizard: i got a 3 motherFUCKER
fighter: WE’RE ONLY LEVEL 1 YOU TOOK A THIRD OF MY HEALTH ALREADY
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