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How come reading tea leaves is seen as this sophisticated, witchy thing but if I slam dunk an open can of Chef Boyardee ravioli onto the pavement in the gas station parking lot to see what kind of soda the old ones think I should buy, foodstuff divination suddenly isn’t cool anymore?

‘Tis the fuckin’ season, friends!! Get out there and live your worst life!!

What the fuck is happening

Why don’t you grab a can of ravioli and ask!

Eat the ravioli and read the leftover sauce. It is less wasteful. Just like the sophisticated witchy way of drinking the tea before reading thr leaves.

That’s easy mode, baby.

You gotta’ dump boiling tea on your head like you just won the Superbowl and then read the resulting burns.

You’re all cowards and chumps and you’re also not invited to my Divination Fight Club where we punch each other with crystal brass knuckles and then read the bruises.