whetstonefires:

i’ve always hated the saying ‘no use crying over spilled milk’ because it’s accurate but at the same time it’s so cruel. it gets pulled out to deny people’s right to mourn things, little losses and big ones, mistakes that burn, to force them to move on immediately after the blow has fallen simply because you are not emotionally engaged in the situation.

it gets used to make a virtue of denying people empathy.

and i’m fully aware that staying there on my knees bawling over the waste of the precious milk that i will never have more of again and the waste of the labor dedicated to acquiring it and my own idiocy in knocking it over and the poisoned memories of my joy at having milk in the first place aren’t useful, but making me ashamed of falling down doesn’t make getting up any easier