get ready….your strife specibi is reflective of ur sexuality

“but OP what the fuck does that mean” well let me tell u. depending on how ur weapon works/is used in battle, it can mean you’re gay/bi/pan/etc. examples:

ONE WEAPON, USES BOTH HANDS (hammer, chainsaw, katana, etc) : gay/lesbian

TWO HANDED WEAPON (cane, needles, dual wielding pistols) : bi/pan, probably

BIG ASS PSYCHIC BLASTS: sollux

“what about dave’s broken sword and vriska’s (multiple) D8” well buddy sexuality is a complex deal, and a very important part of what makes someone who they are. dave and vriska have fragmented weapons which parallels their uncertainty about who they truly are as individuals, past a basic sexual orientation level. you could read this as “trauma is fucked up and fucks w/ you and also makes you have weird weapons in a virtual game” and/or “dave and vriska…trans”. either way i’m right 

i look in the mirror every day

But John was never confirmed not strait

I can only think of two that were ever confirmed anything

john egbert literally said he was gay? do you not remember the coming out episode in season 3? wow fake fan :(