solarsyrup:

Apparently people really like seeing the Zelda enemies get rated so here’s Octoroks!

There’s, uh… there’s kind of a lot

Legend of Zelda NES / Link’s Awakening / Oracle of Ages & Seasons

Oh. OH. OOOOHHH. Look at that! Right outta the gate and they nailed it! These guys are the perfect blend of evil and cute. I wanna have one as a pet!

10/10

The Adventure of Link

Quiet. Reserved. Thoughtful. They write poetry and might let you see it if you ask nicely. But they also spam rocks like nobody’s business and honestly they need to tone it down

7/10

Ocarina of Time / Majora’s Mask

Dear god, these make me want to cry. It’s like someone tried to squeeze a nightmare through a playdoh spaghetti maker. Just looking at this thing is giving me radiation sickness

2/10

Wind Waker

Hm. Okay, still gross, but they kinda cleaned up. Maybe too much so. Sometimes you just wanna take a boat ride but these jerks just won’t leave you alone

4/10

Phantom Hourglass / Spirit Tracks

“K-kill me, Link… every heartbeat is an eternity of suffering…”

0/10

Skyward Sword

Goin’ back to that “mysterious” look, and I kinda dig that. They’re a bit introverted and that’s okay. But they’re also stealin’ that Deku Scrub style and I gotta dock points for that

8/10

A Link to the Past / A Link Between Worlds / Tri Force Heroes

Look at ‘em!! Devious but squishy. They’re like if someone gave sentience and spite to a water balloon— just the right amount of fun and lethal

9/10

Breath of the Wild

I kinda like these guys. A little cephalopodic for my tastes, but you know what? That’s fair. Octoroks are already based on—

Wait 

Hold on just a second, is that a… treasure chest? 

Well, don’t mind if I just—

BWAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGHHH