youngstero:

one time at this bar mitzvah I was at the dj emcee guy was like “if your sock has a hole in it you get this piece of candy” so this kid tore a hole in this sock real quick and ran up there and then this dick dj goes “ALL SOCKS HAVE HOLES IN THEM!!!!” and starts raining down candy like it’s golden hellfire and I look at this kid and he’s crying while holding his shitty ruined sock

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