tricktster:

its-spelt-like-k-a-i-t:

tricktster:

tricktster:

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tricktster:

boss asked me if i knew what a brony was today but he pronounced it like “brownie” then started explaining, but somehow I’M THE WEIRD ONE FOR INTERRUPTING WITH “Oh, you mean BRONYS, yeah, they do want to fuck horses!”

boss today asked me if I knew what a bear was and it took the incredible effort of forcing every bone in my body to solidify into one giant Super Bone and in the process fusing my jaw shut for me to stop myself from saying “uh, yeah dude, you but gay.”

boss texted me today about all the business we’ve been getting and i texted back “haha yup our dance card is getting pretty full!” followed immediately by two minutes of debilitating panic about whether that was an actual saying or just some nonsense I’d made up.

boss came to my office today strictly to tell me he got hamilton tickets and had the nerve to be insulted when i referred to him as “the biggest copycat there ever was.”

boss today texted me the most unorthodox elipsis i’ve ever seen

my boss’s parents and my parents each have vacation homes in the same retirement community, which is widely rumored to be a hotbed of sexual depravity, so sometimes i deliberately antagonize him by implying - very innocently and with plausible deniability - that our parents swing with each other

boss just came into my office to ask me a question, paused and said “what the FUCK are you listening to?” and when i sheepishly admitted it was a remix of the wii shop channel music, he just left.

op what is your occupation

Rascal.