*takes off my shirt in front of my love interest so she can see all my scars like in an angsty book scene*
Her, delicately tracing them with her fingertips: what……happened to you
Me: WELL that one’s where I lied down on a lightbulb and THAT one is from running through cornstalks barefoot and THAT one is because I kept scratching a mosquito bite in my sleep and THAT one is from fighting a goose and tHIs is from when I fell through a window in a tickle fight, an-
Why does anyone try to fight a goose?
Sometimes the goose gives you no option
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