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If a pound translates to $1.59, dies that mean that a ton of dollars would be $3180?

no, that just means a ton is 3180 pounds in Briton

A ton is 2000 pounds

Yes, I know, but 3180 brittish pounds would be $5056.20

and I think we’re both lost in this racial mind screw

If you had a brittish pound and converted it into american currency, you would have $1.59 so if you had 2000 pounds (because 2000 lbs is a ton) you would have $3180. therefore $3180 is a ton of dollars.