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there’s either a small snake or a giant slug in my kitchen but ill never know because i left my glasses in the other room

what kills a slug that won’t make a snake attack me

the internet said salt kills slugs so imma just toss a bunch of salt all over the floor and hope it dies or evaporates or something

so i ended up throwing salt all over my kitchen floor, texting my fam to keep my dog out of there, and going to bed. i woke up to my mom finding “piss-like-goo” all over the floor because the slug/snake had melted. and apparently that slug thingy was “a regular” who “visted often” and my mom named it gary. rip to gary i guess

imagine showing up to your sidechicks house and her blind son is there this time and he just throws acid on you bc he can’t see and you end up melting into a piss-like-glue

hmmm I’m not sure I’m liking the narrative of my mom fucking a slug named gary