I am apparently working on becoming a local cryptid at the store. Talents include:
- Monitoring the changing of the seasons via mozzarella
- Predicting the weather by picking up a piece of cheese and mysteriously saying “oh, the storm is gonna be bigger than we thought...” just before thunder
- Mind reading, e.g. “Can you help me find a cheese? It’s called, uh... [starts fishing out shopping list]” “Gruyere?” “...yes O_o”
- Mozzarella doubles in sales in the span of a week, right about when the first tomatoes show up
- Cheese that I’ve wrapped in plastic will acquire condensation in a few seconds when it’s about to rain big time
- “Gruyere” is always the cheese people want to show me on their list rather than try to pronounce it.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Cheesewitching. I respect it.