prokopetz:

cipheramnesia:

prokopetz:

prokopetz:

prokopetz:

Concept: a superhero team whose shared origin story is that they’re all exes of this angsty sadboy wizard type who has a penchant for inadvertently getting his significant others killed, cursed, or otherwise magically befuckened as collateral damage to his various misadventures (and who is definitely not a transparent John Constantine expy), and their uniting high-level mission statement is their shared desire to track this guy down and just comprehensively beat the shit out of him.

“And then he was like ‘I have to kill you for your own good’.”

“He didn’t!”

“He did. And the curse wasn’t even that bad – like, it looked nasty, but I’m pretty sure I could have pulled through. But no, apparently not being pretty anymore warrants a mercy killing.“

“That’s so typical of him.“

“And then he didn’t even do it right! I got better!”

“He’s such a fuckup.“

“I know, right? Like, if you’re going to be all ‘boo hoo, the cruel hand of fate has forced me to slay the love of my life’, the least you could do is follow through. Is it weird for me to be mad about that?“

“No, I get it. For anybody else it’d be a little weird to be mad at them for not murdering you properly, but for him, I get it.“

“So that’s my story. What about you?“

“Miscast fireball.“

#my angsty sadboy wizard exsona is the shy awkward magical apprentice who gets left behind in hell #(and comes back years later as a demon sorceress) (via @morkaischosen)

imagine his relief when he learns all they want to do is beat him up tho, the sheer anticlimax of it all

In the movie adaptation, the beating continues in the background throughout the entirety of the credits roll.

turns out there was no curse, he was just an asshole