This was my actual favorite part of working in a theater. People would come in and use a string of words no human had ever uttered and I’d have to be like “ohhhhkay let’s parse this out.”

When we had Moonlight:
Moonshine, Moonrise, Midnight, Nightlight, Nighttime, Twilight

My favorite in recent memory, though:
“The Big Sick” = “The Fat Bad”

Don’t… Don’t movie theaters have…the names of the movies… Right… There?

Ah, see, the problem here is that you’re making the common mistake of assuming people bother to read anything. At all. At any given point. When in the presence of customer service worker.