penny-anna:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

Consider: Hobbits unused to carrying swords, initially VERY unclear on when it’s appropriate to whip em out

Merry and Pippin have a disagreement over, idk, whether cake or pie is better and both draw their swords like ‘HAVE AT THEE’ 

meanwhile Aragorn in the background like, boys please, please boys those are sharp

Frodo: *napping*

Boromir: hey Frodo wake up we need to talk-

Sam: he’s having his nap sir

Boromir: Sam please this is important

Sam: *draws his fucking sword* HE’S HAVIN HIS NAP GO AWAY

Frodo is slightly more sensible & very polite

Frodo: *sees Aragorn with his sword drawn* oh is there trouble. should i get out my sword

Aragorn: …no that’s alright

Frodo: are you sure it’s no trouble

Aragorn: Frodo if i want you to draw your sword I’ll. I’ll say so alright

Frodo: ah, alright :) just say the word

Boromir: *grabs Sam’s sword* ok I’m confiscating this till you learn how to use it appropriately

Sam: *does not let go*

Boromir: *pulls harder*

Sam: *still does not let go*

Boromir: *slowly dragging Sam across the ground* HOW ARE YOU SO STRONG

Frodo: *waking up* WHAT… is going on

Boromir: *holding sword like 6 feet up in the air w Sam dangling off it* um

Sam: I’m handling it Mr Frodo go back to sleep

Boromir: *yelling* HOW ARE YOU SO HEAVY

Sam: *also yelling* WE’RE A VERY DENSE PEOPLE

Frodo: *likewise yelling* I WAS ASLEEP FOR 2 MINUTES WHY ARE WE YELLING

Boromir: UGH fine!! keep it! *drops Sam on the fucking ground*

*insert Merry and Pippin cheering here*

Boromir never lives it down. Merry & Pippin forever after refer to the incident as ‘that time Sam bested Boromir in a fight’. :)

gandalf: you should have cooked some food that requires two hands to eat. thats how i got bilbo to let go of my staff all those years ago