shingekinokyojinheaven:

the-vashta-nerada:

one time my sisters and i were driving around and we saw a mcdonald’s and the m was kind of loose because there was a bunch of wind

and my older sister was like “mel i dare you do go steal that m”

so of course i don’t back down from a dare and i pried the m loose from the sign and we stole that mcdonald’s m and we hung it outside of our house because our last name starts with m and it was clever okay

but the manager of that mcdonalds FOLLOWED US HOME TO OUR HOUSE and they came to our door a few hours later and my mom answered and the manager was like “…it’s peculiar that you have a mcdonald’s m outside of your house when ours got stolen”

and my mom was like “yeah what an odd coincidence”

and the manager came by like the next day and my mom answered again and the manager was like “alright we know what your fucking brat kids did” and my mom was like “my children would nEVER”

and she closed the door on her and she was like “marielle you little shit”
but then we took the m off of our house to throw off the manager and it’s in our garage now

but yeah i stole a big golden arch from mcdonald’s once

amateur

That doesn’t count. The dead don’t follow you home when you take from them.